An Element of Entropy
by Casa Circe
Summary: LOTURA WEEK 2018, Day Four: Equilibrium. He had managed to throw her off balance twice, once when he had made her trust him, and again when he had shattered that trust into nothing.


**LOTURA WEEK 2018 Day 4**

 **Equilibrium**

 _ **An Element of Entropy**_

 **DISCLAIMER:** I don't own Voltron: Legendary Defender.

 **NOTE:**

 _I've finished season 6 and I have a lot of mixed feelings about this ship now, mostly sad about all the POTENTIAL. But I still ship it to a certain extent so I will keep writing this week._

 _My contributions are going to be a lot darker though for the rest of the week, given how the last season ended. There is at least a lot of angst to mine from the season and I don't know if I will ever be able to write something fluffy for these two for a while._

 _Enjoy!_

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Voltron had restore balance to the universe. The days of chaos and strife were at last behind them, and a new era of peace and prosperity had begun.

Everyone celebrated this long-awaited victory, and the festivities lasted for months as people were determined to properly mark such a historic transition. There feasts and parties in every planet of the alliance, colorful festivals, concerts, and even plays performed to reenact the heroic quest of the legendary defender. The paladins received more invitations than they knew what to do with and they found themselves busier than they ever were when they were fighting to protect countless worlds.

Allura bore everything with the grace and dignity that befitted her rank. She wore the mask of composure and happiness expertly but the paladins knew her enough to know that she still hid deeper wounds than she would care to admit. They tried their best to comfort her but they also knew that she would always put up a brave face despite her pain. Coran certainly knew that she continued to nurse her broken heart but he did not push her to speak of it because he knew she needed time and space to grieve.

Nearly two years had passed since that fateful battle in the quintessence field but every detail of that fight, and all the events that led up to it, remained vivid in Allura's memory. Not a day went by when she didn't think of the Galra prince who had so easily bewitched and betrayed her. He had managed to throw her off balance twice, once when he had made her trust him, and again when he had shattered that trust into nothing.

"We can't just leave him here," she had told her teammates, feeling mercy towards Lotor in spite of everything. And she knew that the other paladins would have followed her if they could.

But in the end, they had had no choice. They had needed to escape, and so the mad emperor had to be left behind.

Some would say that this was punishment enough for the atrocities he had committed, unspeakable acts against her people, a people he had claimed to love and protect, even at the expense of the Galra. Even now, Allura could not fully understand him.

He had said that what he had felt for her was real. In the heat of battle, she had dismissed this as another one of his lies and she had denied ever feeling anything for him. But now she knew that she had felt something real, and that was why the truth was almost more than she could bear. She had never had such a deep connection with anyone, an emotional bond built over shared history and culture, and what she thought were shared beliefs. As painful as it was to admit it, she had loved him and that was what destroyed her from the inside. Because she hoped, despite everything, that he could be saved.

There was one secret she kept from all the paladins and one she hoped to keep as long as possible. Whatever bond she had formed with Lotor when they were in the quintessence field had somehow endured, in spite of all her efforts to deny or destroy it. They shared the mark of the chosen in Oriande, and they were bound by a force neither of them could ever comprehend. In the end, even he had tried to sever ties with her, but neither of them had succeeded.

For nearly two years, she would get recurring visions of him, fragmented glimpses of a broken figure surrounded by quintessence. At first she had attributed this to nightmares but she soon recognized them to be something more. She had not recognized him at first, but later realized, who else could it be? But this was not the power-mad Galra emperor they had left behind nor the gentle but capable warrior she had come to love. This was a creature who had paid a heavy price for his ambition.

Allura could not help but be moved by pity at the sight. She was not sure if he was calling out to her for help or if this was simply a side-effect of their unique bond. But for the moment, she could not bring herself to do anything about it. She had not yet forgiven him and she was not sure she would ever be able to.

All she knew now was that there was an element of entropy out there in the universe, one that threatened to shake the equilibrium she had been trying so hard to maintain.


End file.
